It's kind of appropriate that I can't really be arsed to write this today, given that the titular character of Guillermo Del Toro's Hellboy is very much the poster child for can't-be-arsedness. As played by Ron Perlman, he's a great, shambling slob of a creature with way too many cats and a penchant for classic American junk food.
Is it any wonder that I find him a more appealing and accessible superhero than most of the current crop? You wouldn't want to invite Captain America over to watch bad movies; how would you be able to enjoy yourself properly knowing he was judging you for the stains on the carpet and the cat hairs in the snacks? Hellboy, though, he'd feel right at home.
I know everybody's favourite Del Toro movie is supposed to be Pan's Labyrinth, but dammit, I just like this one better. I'm not saying it is better - the acting is dodgy and the plot's a hopeless muddle - but I definitely like it more. It retains Del Toro's visual artistry and gentle humanity, bringing them to a genre which was and is in desperate need of both. Mr. B says it's overly sentimental. Me, I say that's the whole point. I love Hellboy, his pyrokinetic girlfriend Liz and thoughtful fishman Abe, whilst Jeffrey Tambor takes the character of Tom Manning, a spiritual precursor to Clark Gregg's Phil Coulson, and makes him the prematurely-aged, frustrated curmudgeon you'd have to be if you were babysitting a superhero team.
There's a story in there somewhere; it involves the Nazis, Rasputin and a bunch of Catholic exorcist-style stuff. This isn't why I watch the movie. I watch it because it portrays its heroes as fuckups - not tragic, operatic-style fuckups who come shining through, but everyday low-grade messes who make mistakes and then struggle to clean them up as best they can. It makes me feel hopeful, and is there anything better you can say about a superhero movie than that?
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